i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize
