he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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