so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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