dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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