Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(516): View more from New York

I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank

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(516): I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank http://tfl.nu/rnlw

Replies (22) Good night (618) Bad night (1807) Order T-Shirt
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(850): View more from Florida

OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.

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(850): OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you. http://tfl.nu/hptp

Replies (11) Good night (803) Bad night (3442) Order T-Shirt
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(602): View more from Arizona

Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.

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(602): Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter. http://tfl.nu/60s7

Replies (17) Good night (1056) Bad night (4634) Order T-Shirt
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(308): View more from Nebraska

Best friends brother. Beat that.

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(308): Best friends brother. Beat that. http://tfl.nu/zx73

Replies (91) Good night (6192) Bad night (1286) Order T-Shirt
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(440): View more from Ohio

He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.

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(440): He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am. http://tfl.nu/6rv7

Replies (13) Good night (4053) Bad night (690) Order T-Shirt
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(506): View more from New Brunswick

She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable

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(506): She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable http://tfl.nu/lnzm

Replies (8) Good night (1188) Bad night (3220) Order T-Shirt
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(419): View more from Ohio

cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.

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(419): cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over. http://tfl.nu/mynf

Replies (1) Good night (1803) Bad night (891) Order T-Shirt
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(305): View more from Florida

You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.

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(305): You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican. http://tfl.nu/uy37

Replies (5) Good night (2658) Bad night (698) Order T-Shirt
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(406): View more from Montana

I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.

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(406): I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name. http://tfl.nu/y6iz

Replies (3) Good night (2963) Bad night (558) Order T-Shirt
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(509): View more from Washington

Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.

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(509): Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad. http://tfl.nu/dn7l

Replies (11) Good night (1947) Bad night (1243) Order T-Shirt
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(920): View more from Wisconsin

If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet

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(920): If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet http://tfl.nu/w7lt

Replies (3) Good night (1860) Bad night (632) Order T-Shirt
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(605): View more from South Dakota

This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.

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(605): This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired. http://tfl.nu/sykd

Replies (1) Good night (2338) Bad night (612)
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(217): View more from Illinois

If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know

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(217): If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know http://tfl.nu/k0hk

Replies (1) Good night (1232) Bad night (420)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels

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(412): Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels http://tfl.nu/7a7h

Replies (1) Good night (897) Bad night (278)
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(303): View more from Colorado

New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...

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(303): New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later... http://tfl.nu/qijg

Replies (4) Good night (794) Bad night (179)

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