Your dad touched me again.
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
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a search helicopter?!
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
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bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not