YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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