I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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