Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
You should frame my arrest warrant.
did i just pee glitter
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
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