Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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