well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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