I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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