I want to walk on stilts...naked
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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