Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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