guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
