omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
