just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Randomize
