Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
