oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
