My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
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