Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
