i jhust puked up my retainher.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Randomize
