I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
