i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize