just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
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