Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
so much tequila, so little girl.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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