UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
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