fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize