i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
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Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
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Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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