I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
