they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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