yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
