small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
