12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
I have post one night stand depression
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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