In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
he wants to bone in the snuggie
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
