Me too!
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Randomize
