problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
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