just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Randomize
