You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
