Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Randomize
