how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
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