She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
