He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
