why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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