oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
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