id be glad to
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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