Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Drake has all the answers
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Randomize
