The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
i need some magic done to my vagina
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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