that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
