thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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