there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
we should paint friendship bongs
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
